Visitor is in one of the elevators. Clearly, he’s lost. Nearly every floor button is pushed. A CBC staffer gets on and rides one floor down.
Visitor: How do you get out of this building?
CBC staffer: You can’t.
Visitor: Huh?
(door opens, CBCer walks out saying): It’s how we get funding. We hold visitors for ransom. Have a nice day.”
The visitor doesn’t smile.
|
Email This Post |
| Behind the Scenes, Fun Stuff |
HEHEHEHehee! Brilliant.
lol! Hilarious!
Visitor is clearly stupid…
Usually the button marked “G” or “L” or “1″ will get you out of the building.
Those CBC elevators are dangerous places, indeed!
hmmm - not really THAT funny.
As a former CBC Radio and CBC Television Executive Producer I’ve started writing a blog about my “Life-and-Times” at the Corp…you want funny ?
Try prepping Don Harron for his interview with Linda Lovelace — or commiserating with Gzowski over his massive Revenue Canada debt - or trying to recover a national anchor’s (not The National, by the way)…wallet from a Mexican whore house - now THAT was funny.
I wondered what Richard Stursberg was up to.
Yes, brilliant and funny!
There’s Toronto’s Tag Line!!!
Not. Makes us look like a bunch of assholes. Shameful. Might have been funny if there was a ‘just kidding’ followed by actual assistance. But then again I’m a random acts of kindness sort of guy.
I agree Swiv… And we wonder why people hate us here at the Ceeb.
How come a visitor to the CBC was left unescorted?
I am always accompanied by the person who signed me in when I am at the CBC… or is it that I get the stalker special treatment??
People don’t “HATE” the CBC (other than a few embittered right-wing indie producers with terrible pitches which keep getting rejected)..but, in my small experience people ARE irritated by the following three aspects of CBC life -:
1. the abyssmal state of regional programming. (ie) There is none.
I know…I know, it’s an old chestnut - but the Corp still “reeks” of Toronto-centrism. Nepotistic Toronto-centrism. Regional programming (especially on TV) feels either tokenistic or strategic.
I KNOW that the data spreadsheets show there’s more regional programming now that ever — but running endless loops of “Just For Laughs” or hour after hour of Hockey Day in Canada just to get the numbers up, has ZERO relevance to the issues, stories, and lives of those of us who live in the ROC.
2. Mediocrity in programming. Hate to say it …as I’m responsible for many hours of CBC shows … but the Corp still lags years behind the rest of the industry in both the approach and style of story telling.
Televison is expensive. And no-one ever gets fired for saying “no”. So CBC gate-keepers default to the safe position of giving work to those they know won’t fuck-up..either that or they commission the same types of programs over and over again (an approach which now sees the acquisition of British and US format TV.
And no-one outside the Broadcast Centre takes the hype of the “hundreds” of Gemini Award nominations seriously. In fact, it all feels slightly pathetic given that CTV holds 15 our of the top 20 weekly shows…Global has 4…and the Corp usually 1 (either hockey or a news special)
3. Whining. In my opinion, it’s time to stop the chorus of “we-have-no-money”. Guess what — nobody in this industry (other than Bell shareholders and the Aspers) has any money. This business is a tough, brutal industry. Almost every independent prodco finds a way to juggle their cash flow month after month. Whether it’s journalism or entertainment - televison or radio — for the CBC to be constantly asking for more public funding is - in my opinion - foolish and irritating. Yes, we KNOW the CBC needs a mandate review, Yes, we know real dollar funding has fallen. Yes, we know Jim Shaw is a loud mouth gas-bag who is trying to hurt the CBC and sink the CTF.
Guess what ?? Life is hard. Move on. Do your lobbying behind the scenes. We have enough troubles of our own.
…one more thing — no more employee bitching. You guys still get an automatically deposited paycheque every two weeks, right ? Count your blessings.
either that or ….walk-the-walk ….quit.
THEN try to stay alive in this business. THEN try and do shows while paying your mortage and feeding your kids.
I guarantee you, it won’t be the “who’s up who’s down” internal CBC politics that you’ll be worrying about.
dy
I think its funny, shows we are human beings. Not the cold, heartless individuals that the rest of the world thinks we are.
tacky, IMO
Damaged Goods makes some very good points, although the delivery’s rather on the so-excessively-bitter-I’m-prone-to-dismiss-it side.
But I think it points to the same thing Sunshine and I were getting at. . . maybe people don’t ‘Hate the CBC,’ but the we-want-our-funding-now refrain is getting pretty old, especially given the very valid points made about the padding of Regional programming numbers and the overall choices about what gets to air.
CBC staff know all about this stuff, and we know it’s not our fault as individuals, since 99% of us have no say about the big decisions, and griping about that isn’t going to score anyone any brownie points with their managers. So, what’s left is to echo the management complaints about funding. It’s the only safe thing to bitch about when we’re inside the building. But maybe its time to give it a rest, since it all seems to fall on deaf ears anyway . . . I have my doubts that the Mystery Visitor gave it a second thought after (s)he found the exit.
According to the suspiciously snuffly flash designer I was talked at by for a good hour straight the other night, the answer to all our woes is - bring back Zed!
I don’t think people hate the CBC, if all you get is the comments on this blog you might think so - but if you take a slightly more random slice of the public, they may have an opinion but hate doesn’t enter into it. And if money comes up and you point out what the CBC actually costs them, they’re always surprised at how little it is compared to other PSBs.
Kev, what you’ve said says a lot. And what I’d like to respond with is not something that is apparently allowed at this space.
That’s quite a reality you live in, and I can perhaps suggest that if I were producing a public affairs show, you would not be invited to the next meeting.
What you perceive as devoid of hate, is in fact something called ambivalence.
Nope, he definitely wasn’t ambivalent.
I think the CBC would be better off if people did hate it. That would mean that people are aware of it. I do not know a single person who has ever heard of the great exercise in political correctness - Little Mosque. Yet, to the CBC insiders, it is the next Seinfeld or Friends. Maybe even the next Beachcombers.
You guys really do live a very insular existence on someone else’s tab. Isn’t it odd that people and organizations who are so insulated from the real world are usually doing it on the real world’s tab?
I had a clearly frustrated person stop me in the hallway just yesterday with a heartfelt “How do I get OUT of this place??”. Not as bizarre a question as you might think!
It must be great to work in a place where taxpayers’ money as created such a giant labyrinth. I don’t think that things like this exist in the real world.
Mike: I’m sure CSIS’ giant underground lair (not that it exists) would have us beat. Though I think we got the same contractor for the signs.
here’s a tip…next time someone asks you “how to get out” of this place, point them to the ‘job’ ads in the back of Playback (if they even know what Playback is)…and tell them to apply for a couple of 25k a year jobs with prodcos, and if they get one - take a 6 month leave of absence and go for it.
I guarantee 100 F***ing percent they’ll be back and kissing the grounds of the TBC as they walk through those doors.
you guys really don’t get it - do you ?? Despite all the crap the CBC is not only THE best place in this country to work — but one of THE best places in the entire industry. Having a CBC employment history on your CV is like having played for the Habs in the 70s…the Oilers in the 80s.. the Leafs in the…the…the….well, you get my point. It’s solid gold. And you should count your blessings everytime you see that auto deposit in your bank account.
dy
I have to agree. That’s not so funny. I’ve occasionally got a bit lost in that place after arriving for training.
Well if anyone hates the CBC (radio) count me in, despite hours of listening many days. Its way beyond the valid points Damaged Goods makes - biased and self serving are only the start. Some day historians will look back and identify CBC as the fuse that blew up the nation. Other media may be worse but differ in that I MUST pay for loading this gun aimed at my home.